Ballots and beer
It’s safe to say that in Portland’s little liberal bubble (aka Palin’s “fake America”) there is a feeling of almost electric anticipation about tomorrow’s election. Like the fuse of a Change-loving, Yes-We-Can-spouting firework, we’re lit and waiting for the impending explosion of President Obama…unless of course everything we’ve heard, seen, and read is wrong. In which case we’ll be headfirst in a pile of our own filth and locally brewed beer come Wednesday morning.
But I’m optimistic. It brings to mind a line the godlike comedian Bill Hicks had when visualizing a world that has just heard that there’s a cure for AIDS: “They’ll be [having sex] in the streets!” (Yes, that line is sanitized a bit) And while I doubt there will be mass celebratory copulation in the lanes and avenues of our fair town, everyone I’ve talked to is buzzing about election night parties in the same way they’d be talking about a Super Bowl party.
There are plenty of places to get your balloty booze on, but if you’re lacking any ideas save for buying a six-pack and spending the evening with CNN and their hypnotizing electoral map might we offer up our own little election shin-dig? We’re calling it the Election Night Elixir Party and it’s going down at the Aura Restaurant and Lounge at 1022 West Burnside. Things get cranking at 6 and there’s no cover charge save for a suggested donation to a charitable organization. Watch live results on the big screen and compete in the political figure costume contest hosted by Poison Waters.
I’m going to predict that if a couple comes dressed as Bill O’Reilly and a loofah, they’ll win this thing hands down.
And oh yeah, vote.