↑ Upside
- Payment gives sense of pride of ownership in single screw on latest F-18
- Citizens shouldn’t be trusted with full paycheck anyway
- Subsidizing billionaires never not rewarding
- Even presidents pay them, we’re pretty sure
- Only financially sound reason to have kids
- Change two letters and get s-e-x or t-o-y
- Better than the other sure bet, probably
- Occasionally leads to a tea party
- We’re sleazy for that 1040-EZ
↓ Downside
- Detracts from glory of April’s Administrative Professionals Day
- Meanies at H&R Block ended Ken Jennings’s Jeopardy streak
- Normal people don’t get to do the “and spend” part
- “Schedules” never seem to include fun activities
- Not prorated for government shutdowns
- Supporting wars you don’t believe in
- Standard deduction is so basic
- Cooler in Europe
Published in the 75 Things Every Portlander Must Do issue of Portland Monthly.
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