Perfect Party: Spring 2023

Nicole Chung 

An opening toast from this Oregon-raised author and former managing editor of the Toast, who visits Powell’s April 20 with her new memoir, A Living Remedy. Nicole, we’ll welcome your musings on family, grief, and distance, but you’re welcome to surprise us with a raunchy limerick, too. 

Sam Adams 

Since this city director of strategic innovations got fired, he has time to help set the table and stay to clean up. Sam, you’ve been a mayor, mayor’s aide, city commish, and, some say, shadow mayor, but if you have your heart set on working at city hall again, janitor might be the ticket.  

The Residents  

We’ll top dessert with eyeball jellies for this bizarro art-rock collective hitting the Wonder Ballroom March 16, part of a belated 50th anniversary tour. Fine with us if you leave your masks on—we know the mystery is part of your gimmick, and it’s a pandemic-friendly move, too. 

Ronnie Gajownik 

Big League Chew instead of after-dinner mints for the Hillsboro Hops’ new skipper, the first woman to manage a Class High-A minor league baseball team. Ronnie, you can bring Barley T. Hop as your plus-one, but please leave the mascot from your last team (Ruckus the Sod Poodle) at home.  

Ghost of the Fort Stevens Whale 

Phantom plankton for this fella, a 20-year-old sperm whale, who washed ashore at Fort Stevens after being struck by a ship. Spermie, we know it wasn’t much fun to be turned into an open-air science experiment, but it beats being dynamited by the highway department, right? 

Published in the Oregon State Parks 2023 issue of Portland Monthly.