The Perfect Party: July 2012

The guests we’d most like at our dinner table this month.

June 22, 2012 Published in the July 2012 issue of Portland Monthly

AMANDA FRITZ AND MARY NOLAN We set up an intimate two-top in a curtained alcove for these city council rivals, whose fierce race goes to November after neither landed a knockout in May’s primary. Ladies, it feels like you’ve moved in to star in an unpleasant reality show. So share a dish (Ethiopian, maybe?) and make nice.

JON ISAACS Our other post-primary invite goes to the director of one-time frontrunner Eileen Brady’s campaign, which spent over $1 million to finish third in (and exit) the mayor’s race. Jon, we’ve prepared a platter of deep-fried comfort foods to ease the pain. Bring something nice to drink. Money’s no object here.

JOHN GRAY A place of honor goes to this 92-year-old chainsaw tycoon, whose $2 million gift spurred the biggest Habitat for Humanity project Oregon’s ever seen: an east-side subdivision that’s made the nonprofit one of the city’s biggest homebuilders. John, you remind us of the days when the words “civic minded” and “lumberman” fit together like a dovetail joint. Cheers.

THE ZEBRA HOODIE BABY Pull up a high chair for Jack Baltzor, a fearless (or oblivious) 13-month-old who hit YouTube stardom after his zebra-themed sweatshirt attracted a ravenous lion at the Oregon Zoo. Good thing that cat was behind glass—but he does look cute in stripes.

JYOTHI PULLA A second helping for this Portland mom, who helped lead the doomed campaign to save Portland Public Schools’ Harriet Tubman Young Women’s Leadership Academy from the budgetary ax. Jyothi, fuel up on carbs. You may have lost the battle, but the struggle continues.

RETIRED CHICKENS This feast is all-vegetarian in honor of elderly fowl now putting their egg-laying days peacefully behind them on a five-acre “retirement community” in Estacada. So, guys, do enlighten us on the eternal question: which comes first …

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