Abundance is the law of the land at this big-boy playground. In addition to the ESPN overload—the bar sports some fifty TVs—I learn that there are nine kinds of sliders, six sauces for hot wings, and three types of french fries. There are also three bars, three separate dining rooms, and an enormous recreation room with the latest in Xbox and Wii entertainment.

As March Madness approaches, hoop hounds will be well provided for with plenty of sandwiches, salads, steaks, and soups on the menu. Hot-wing lovers will jump at the “wing flights,” and though I didn’t sample all six varieties of marinade, the red curry wings were satisfyingly tangy and spicy.

For each tasty local craft beer (Ninkasi IPA, Mt Hood Hogsback Oat Stout), there’s a corresponding cocktail misfire, such as the Agent Orange, an adolescent blend of Absolut Mandarin and Red Bull. And what macho sports fan is going to order a drink called a Coco Kiss? The cheeseburger sliders were perfectly cooked: too bad the buns were cheap, chewy white bread.

These are still early days at the Agency, but a smart coach might advise the powers that be to focus on the fundamentals.