ONE-SENTENCE STORIES

Humpty Dumpty, Record-Breaking Yogis, and Beer in Space

It's another installment of the shortest stories in journalism—because there's simply no time for details.

Illustrations by Nomad September 2, 2014 Published in the September 2014 issue of Portland Monthly

INDUSTRY

A tricked-out, Portland-designed cooler raised millions on Kickstarter, prompting imitators to add margarita blenders to their crochet art and demo CDs.

BROMOPHOBIA

Enraged “bronies” stampeded the Portland Mercury’s comment section to protest a story that suggested that men who obsess over My Little Pony may, in fact, be a little weird. 

TRAGEDY

A Humpty Dumpty statue that fell off a wall at Oregon’s Enchanted Forest theme park (and could not be put together again) put London Bridge and the Three Blind Mice on notice. 

#GREATNAMASTE

A yoga session at Pioneer Courthouse Square may have broken the world record for largest yoga chain, but barely challenged the usual daily total of zoned-out people lying there.  

 

SCIENCE

The Ninkasi SpaceProgram sent the ashes of Portland beer-culture icon Don Younger into suborbital space, pushing the parameters of how far gone you can get on microbrew. 

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