The Shakedown

What’s the Deal with the Portland Winterhawks?

On the ice with our junior hockey team, who start their 44th season September 21

By Portland Monthly Staff August 27, 2019 Published in the September 2019 issue of Portland Monthly


Native mascot and logo not problematic at all

Won league championship three times, giving other local teams something to aspire to

Locker room talk sprinkled with adorable “ehs”

Fans who ride the MAX to games can chuckle about “straddling the Blue Line”

Host family program fulfills widely held dream of adopting a sweaty teenager

Boast a tougher name than our earlier hockey team, the Portland Rosebuds

More prom date choices for Sunset High students


Annual Teddy Bear Toss discriminates against other cuddly creatures

Hard to keep track of Kaden, Kaedan, Kaiden, Kaeden, and Caiden on opposing teams

Lack of mullets on roster ... are these even real hockey players?

As soon as you pick your favorite, he leaves for the NHL

Tickets actually affordable, so harder to justify not going

Nothing should be called a Fanboni

Players’ points-per-game records don’t come close to Dame’s, so why bother?

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