Week two of Project Runway gave the designers an, er, interesting challenge. Each of the two teams had to make uniforms for Susan Sarandon’s ping-pong nightclub. That sounds like a metaphor for something, but it’s not. And side note: Only Susan Sarandon is cool enough to pull off having a ping-pong club with sexy people milling about. 

Once again, there seems to be a billion designers at play here (real number, fifteen), and we’re going off first impressions that have been artfully edited to portray whatever the hell the producers wanted to. 

• Michelle gets sassy over hot male models. We can relate.
• Joseph likes to screen-print mountains of cats onto vintage sweaters. From this point on, we love him regardless.
• Once we got over how cool Benjamin’s accent was and realized he was being a Bossy Britches, we were over him.
• Cindy threw some ‘tude, and it was kind of awesome.
• Making pants makes Matthew sad, and making kilts makes him happy. You go Matthew!
• James likes to play on a team of one.

Once the outfits started coming together, a few things start to come to light. Once again, the Dream Team has absolutely no cohesion in their fabrics, color palette, or general design aesthetic. Why can’t we get that part together Dream Team?! We want you to succeed. It’s hurting. Especially while over on Team Keeping it Real (name induced cringe) the magical and endearing Daniel is simultaneously mentoring young Layana while banging out a cute outfit.

After the runway show, it was painfully obvious what the judges thought. The kilt sunk with a thud (we say thumbs up for trying something different), a hotel receptionist blazer does not work at a sexy game club, and pockets built into a skort means a winning look.  Layana snagged the prize (in part thanks to Daniel and his moustache) and James went home to design more things alone.

Previews for next week show the teams have to design something for the hardest client of all…Heidi Klum. That’s sure to be fun/disastrous/entertaining.