The Swimming Hole Code of Conduct
Music. Put away the speakers. We are not in the wilderness to be reminded of Flo Rida’s good fortune.
Scent. Heavy perfume is a strange choice for the outdoors. Even stranger in the water.
Flotation. If your inflatable bouncy castle is more than a quarter of the size of a given lake, consider water wings instead.
Decorum. Pack out your trash, lest the water become a Lesser Great Pacific Garbage Patch—and that includes toilet paper, heathens.
Animals. Monitor your canid. We’re sure you have a great dog, and great dogs do not awaken sleeping strangers with a funky mist as they shake themselves dry.
Multimedia. We are not consenting extras in your epic GoPro production.
Sex. PDA? W8!