The Perfect Party May 2013

A made-up mash-up of the month's most fascinating people (and shrubbery)

May 1, 2013 Published in the May 2013 issue of Portland Monthly

Image: Nomad

THE MILL ENDS PARK TREE About the time the tiny tree in downtown’s two-foot-wide Mill Ends Park (the world’s smallest!) disappeared, we found this lovely centerpiece. Coincidence! Anyway, the missing tree reappeared a few days later. Or at least a tree that looked like the original.

CHANDRA BROWN Head of the table goes to the erstwhile chief of Estacada’s United Streetcar, recently tabbed by the Prez as deputy assistant commerce secretary for manufacturing. Chandra, everyone joked about United’s repeated delays on delivering Portland’s streetcars. But congratulations! We’ve prepared a slow-food appetizer plate in your honor ... OK, we’ll stop. 

MARCOS UGARTE An extra helping of dessert is reserved for this 15-year-old Troutdale hero who rescued a child neighbor from a fire. Marcos, your story filled us with pride in Greater Portlandia. On the downside, it made us too nervous to barbecue. We ordered out. 

BARBARA BANKE For a first toast, cue the chair of California’s 35-brand wine behemoth Jackson Family, who is buying nearly 400 acres of prime Willamette Valley vineyard land. We’ll grant you a pass, Barbara, until we slurp your first pinot. 

CRAIG BERKMAN This former Republican gubernatorial candidate needs a stiff drink after the SEC accused him of telling investors they were buying pre-IPO shares of Facebook, Groupon, and other companies, then using their money to pay his own bills. Craig, let’s talk about how to define “innovation.”  

JACK BOGDANSKI The ever-grumpy Lewis & Clark prof and one-time tiresome blogger is looking to stomp November’s successful ballot initiative to support arts education and institutions with a lawsuit arguing its $35/person assessment is unconstitutional. Jack, how ’bout you bring dessert . . . maybe some candies from the pockets of small children? 

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